Stepping into innumerable homes in the urban, suburbs and valley areas over the past 23 years, as a medical and psychiatric registered nurse–crossing racial, cultural and religious fences– has taught me valuable things about my patients and being human.
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We are more alike than different. Respect is everything!
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Feeling cared about is a common theme. Folks are broken; hurting physically and emotionally. They want to know that their presence or absence means something to somebody. Loneliness is an infection that runs rampant in many homes.
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Framed family pics showcased on the dining room table and walls are a source of immense pride. But family dynamics can also be incredibly complicated, twisted and estranged. And, sometimes emotionally abusive.
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Our elderly need to be listened to; not talked at, dismissed or ignored. They still have something valuable to say and share. Wisdom earned should be honored, not tossed away like a bag of bad lettuce.
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Be sincere. A fake nurse with no empathy and bags of biases and judgment won’t go far. Patients smell an impostor as soon as they open the door. A home care nurse is entering someone else’s turf, not the other way around. Get off your high horse!
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Food and music are balms for healing souls. Being offered homemade biscotti and freshly brewed espresso by my Italian patient’s wife and listening to stories about the ”old country,” warmed my heart. Hearing Salsa music in some of my Latin patient’s homes instantly invigorates a home and makes me feel energized, too. Creature comforts are vital.
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Laughter matters and helps lighten the load if just for a little bit. Older patients love the TV classics, “Family Feud,” “Let’s Make A Deal,” and “The Price is Right.” Baby boomers are glued to “Chicago PD.”
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Love Wins. I don’t love my job every, single day. There are a lot of balls in the air. Dealing with patients coming home with Covid 19 just adds fuel to the fire. But I love that I am connecting with people on a human level and educating them about their illnesses. For many patients, home care nurses are the only people they see on a regular basis.
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Disease doesn’t discriminate. As my mom always said, ”if you live long enough, you will have something.”
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Be kind. Even when it’s hard. To be honest, everyone is not likeable. There are a lot of miserable and hateful people who I don’t want to have lunch with. But everyone has their own stressors they are struggling through. I don’t have to like you to do my job professionally.
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I take my job seriously. Very few jobs allot an inside look into other lives, in their homes, on an intimate level. There are many stressful days loaded with unpredictable situations. Good communication skills come in handy. I am grateful.
These takeaways speak a resounding truth for our family, especially, now as we have home healthcare nurses coming to our house three times a week for my mother-in-law who suffers from Alzheimer’s and related Dementia. We formed an immediate bond with one of the nurses because of all the things you outlined above: she is genuine in her show of empathy, respect, and dignity for Clara, her patient, and for us, the family members. We swap stories, laugh, and worry together about the same things concerning my mother-in-law. This nurse is a welcome addition to our family. And, as far as the older patients’ favorite TV shows, don’t forget “Wheel of Fortune” and “Judge Judy” 😁
Hi Catherine. Thanks for your comments. How did I forget “Wheel of Fortune” and ”Judge Judy?” LOL!!! I am comforted to know that your mom-in-law has wonderful nurses and that your family has a bond. We love families that show interest and are available. It makes such a difference in the care. It really does take a ”village.”